warpedlamp:

When a plan goes off without a hitch when it shouldn’t have worked at all.

image

(via magnusblaine)

whiteboywaves:

why would you ask for nudes. go turn off safe search and google titties wtf stone age bitches can’t work a internet

(via magnusblaine)

lovejoyjohnlock:

iamtiffanyk:

arthurpendumbass:

arthurpendumbass:

their cocks nestled together”

“nuzzled his cock”

“his cock bobbed up and down”

why the fuck do people always describe penises like cute little animals I’m trying to read porn but I just keep imagining puppies

image

I literally just slammed my hands down on my desk, got up, and left for five minutes.

of course this had to happen. What else?

(Source: boywhocriedwerewolfarchive, via magnusblaine)

cakejam:

adobe-outdesign:

sociallychallengednerd:

what if lawn mowers are so loud because they have to cover the screams of the grass being massacred. 

http://media.tumblr.com/9e0ccfbe05bb74b6c1070ff6c2a54558/tumblr_inline_mjwffvintM1qz4rgp.gif

wow what version of windows do u have this is 2014

(via magnusblaine)

kngdmcat:

worthless-wolf:

blacksapphiredragon:

down-sizing:

Let’s remember, Jesus was a Jewish man of color, born homeless to an unwed teenager, who spent his formative years as an illegal immigrant before returning to his home country to hang out with twelve men, prostitutes, and socially untouchable tax collectors while he taught a radical social doctrine of equality, love, and forgiveness that included paying taxes, free healthcare, and the sharing of resources within a community.

#CANON JESUS IS SIX MILLION TIMES BETTER THAN FANON JESUS

Canon Jesus

Jesus called somebody an ass once because they where being rude to a crippled little old lady if you don’t think that’s the tightest shit then get out of my face.

kngdmcat:

worthless-wolf:

blacksapphiredragon:

down-sizing:

Let’s remember, Jesus was a Jewish man of color, born homeless to an unwed teenager, who spent his formative years as an illegal immigrant before returning to his home country to hang out with twelve men, prostitutes, and socially untouchable tax collectors while he taught a radical social doctrine of equality, love, and forgiveness that included paying taxes, free healthcare, and the sharing of resources within a community.

Canon Jesus

Jesus called somebody an ass once because they where being rude to a crippled little old lady if you don’t think that’s the tightest shit then get out of my face.

(Source: worshipyeezus, via magnusblaine)

jerkidiot:

i just realized tater tots is short for potato toddlers and i don’t know how i feel about that

(via butt-leeks)

(Source: unaruto, via thenextkage)

(Source: memewhore, via unlockedfears)

(Source: fakehermes, via unlockedfears)